Invite-only events: meet people in real places and online

Meeting people is often easier in a group. There's less pressure, more to talk about and always someone to turn to if a conversation runs out. On YesTonite, members host events, from a rooftop evening or a picnic in the park to an online mixer, and you can join them from the app or the website.

This guide covers how events work: open and closed events, who's welcome, waitlists, why the address stays private and a few simple safety basics for going along.

Why go to an event?

One-on-one dates are great, but they're not the only way to meet new people. Events give you a shared reason to be there and a natural way to start a conversation. They're also a relaxed option if you're new to casual dating, new to a city or simply prefer to meet people in person before chatting one-on-one.

• Less pressure. You're meeting a group, not auditioning for a date.
• Easy conversation. The event itself gives you something to talk about.
• A gentle start. You can get a feel for people before deciding who you'd like to message.

If you're unsure what casual dating looks like, our guide to what casual dating is is a good place to begin.

Open and closed events

Every host chooses how people join:

• Open events: tap Join and you're in instantly, as long as there's a spot for you.
• Closed events: you send a request and the host approves guests. This is what people usually mean by an invite-only event.

Closed events let hosts shape the mix of people and keep the atmosphere right. If your request isn't accepted, don't take it personally; there are plenty of other evenings.

Who's welcome

Hosts decide who the event is for. They can set spots per sign, for example a number of places for women, for men and for couples, or simply open the event with "everyone welcome" and one shared capacity.

Signs on YesTonite are man, woman, two men, two women, woman + man and other. A couple shares one profile, so they take one spot together.

Waitlists

If the spots for your sign are full, you can join the waitlist. When a spot opens, the next person in line gets an offer and a short time to claim it. If they don't claim it in time, the offer moves to the next person.

Tips for waitlists

• Keep notifications on so you see the offer quickly.
• Only join waitlists for events you'd genuinely go to, so spots go to people who'll show up.
• If your plans change after you're confirmed, let the host know so someone else can take your place.

The address stays private

Before you're confirmed, you only see an approximate area. The exact address and the "how to get in" details, such as a door code, floor or bell name, are shared only with confirmed guests and the host.

Once you're in, you receive a confirmation e-mail with the details and a calendar invite, so the plan is in your diary and easy to find on the night.

Why we do it this way

Keeping the address private protects hosts and guests alike. It means only people who have actually been confirmed know where the event is. It's the same idea as showing an approximate distance on profiles rather than an exact location.

Online events

Some events happen online: a relaxed way to meet new people from home, try out YesTonite or connect with people in other neighbourhoods. As with in-person events, the link is shared with confirmed guests only.

Never miss a host you like

Enjoyed an evening? Tap "notify me about this host's next events" and you'll hear when they plan something new. It's a simple way to find the hosts whose events suit you best.

Hosting your own event

Any member can host. Choose open or closed, set who's welcome and how many spots there are, add the address and how to get in, and decide whether it happens in person or online. Guests get their confirmation e-mail automatically.

1. Pick a place you know and that's easy to reach.
2. Be clear in the description about what the evening is: drinks, a picnic, a gallery visit.
3. Choose a capacity you're comfortable looking after.
4. Welcome people when they arrive and introduce guests to each other.

Safety basics for events

Events are social and relaxed, but the same simple habits apply as for any date:

• Check the area and the time before you go, and tell a friend where you'll be.
• Arrange your own way there and back, and arrive and leave on your own terms.
• Keep an eye on your drink and your belongings.
• Respect everyone's boundaries. "No" or "not tonight" is a complete answer.
• Trust your gut. If something feels wrong, leave, and block or report the person afterwards.

Blocking hides you from each other everywhere, including events. Reporting also blocks by default, and serious reports are reviewed with priority. Our safety guide explains how it all works.

Free to use

YesTonite is free to use. Sign-up is free, you get free new chats every day and replies are always free, so following up with someone you met at an event costs nothing if they message you first. Optional paid extras, such as more new chats or hiding your profile for a while, are there if you want them, with no subscriptions. See Is YesTonite free? for the details.

Find your next event

Browse upcoming events, read how YesTonite works, or see how to find people going out tonight. New here? Sign up free to join or host your own. You need to be 18 or older.